For the past 3 yrs in my college, I never argued vehemently with anyone. I used to argue for two or three minutes and let someone else to take over from the instance where I stopped. After a light argument with one of my friends back in Bangalore, I was given a feedback to have a retrospection on why I never carried on with an argument.What I realized on that session was

1. The first and foremost reason was I was too lazy to continue an argument. I always had a bad notion that I am wasting my energy and time in arguing on trivial issues, which neither affect me nor the other person arguing.
2. I always have been outwitted by the other person giving some idea which I felt, needed a verification from a third party, and by the time I am convinced with the credibility of that idea, the verifier, who was drafted in to give me a neutral view on the other person’s idea would
have taken over.
3. I always felt my friends take the argument too personally, that I feel an air of uneasiness the next time when I meet/talk with him.

On further analysis (true, I did that), I felt my 1st reason has to be got rid of. I felt the need of giving a farewell to my laziness. I realized I am not wasting my energy as long as I am able to pitch my ideas forth in the discussion. The second reason is very tricky, and it need a little more thought to be put into it. In some way, it always happen so that I get some new ideas during these arguments, irrespective of the correctness of the fact being pushed forth to.There are two aspects to be analyzed here
a. Most of the times, the arguer is very stubborn about his viewpiont, and won’t give any attention to the idea being pushed in by the other. He will simply close his eyes to this fact and still continue with his argument as though nothing has happened. Still I need to put forth my points, and it will be satisfying for me to make him listen to what I say, even if he/she might not take it at that time. At some other point of time, he/ she will be in a position to accept not
(may be not openly) to my view point.That idea was very satisfying for me.
b. I need not implement the above idea in all situations. I can give it a shot to look for instant thoughts to counter the argument, which is a very good mental exercise.If not I should not be hesitant to accept his viewpiont or I can hold that point by saying, “I am not commenting on the issue without cross verification”. This is very much effectiveThe third reason was a very bad one that needed to be ripped apart. If I/he/she tends to still rememeber the argument and consider it as a personal attack, it shows the mental block in the concerned person. Thas has got nothing to do with not arguing and conveying my message.
This was a great lesson to be learned and this resulted in my birthday resolution to argue whenever I felt so in any of the ideologies of my friends, and it has so far proven great to me….

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